tick tock tick tock....

you arrive home in 7 days
i am one part excited
i am one part concerned
i always seem to fuck it up when you gets home.

30 days gone
i am worried and
i hate that we are getting
used to being apart

up until may
the longest time we had
been apart was 12 hrs
now a month (?)

we are in such limbo
between a rock
and making a baby
i can’t wait
to be living the married life
rather than just getting by
and living
just to pay bills

sometimes i have to stop
and take a breath
and remember why
and remember what
and remember who
everything just blends into the days
sometimes

i woke up this morning
26 years old
missing out on so much
my list doesn’t seem much
shorter
it’s been amended along the way

i wish i could say “fuck it” to responsibilities too…..