Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Memorable Memorial Day Weekend

Best Line of the Weekend:

“Well I had to go away for a while but…”

After a fun eventful weekend in the states, I am thankful I am Canadian. I just think about their crappy beer, their overambitious political views, their “in-your-face” patriotism, and their insane teenage-pregnancy rate and I cringe. We may live in the murder capital of Canada but I am thankful to be a Winnipegger and more specifically a “Canuck”.

So we leave Winnipeg at 9 am packed full of snacks, (Gin brings flavored water and carrots and I bring chocolate pudding, Reece’s Swoops…ha ha )
We head smoothly to the border… chaos ensues. I’m guessing because we told them we were carrying alcohol …(12 Coolers! Ha ha …. I’ll come to that story) we were asked to come to the garage and follow their instructions. Going into that garage was like going into Edward Carriere’s for a haircut: six million people buzzing around you asking you a million questions and making you feel claustrophobic and nervous. They take our Id’s and ask us what we do for a living, whether we are Canadian citizens and if we were born in Canada. They ask us where we are going and why and look confused when we tell them we are going to a friend’s birthday party (yes sir, we are friends with one those American type people!!) Another boarder patrol dude comes to me and begins asking the same questions (I guess to see if we keep the same story…. oohhhhh) I answer his questions and the first dude tells us to get back into our vehicle. As I step towards my door the second dude with the thick southern accent barks at me “ WHERE ARE YOU GOING, WHO TOLD YOU TO GET BACK INTO YOUR VEHICLE…” The first dude tells the second dude that he did and I scramble for the door and get in. It’s amazing how nervous you get even when you haven’t done anything wrong. The other 4 dudes put all of the contents of our trunk back in and tell us to follow the arrows to get back onto the highway. So we depart thankful for no strip searches or anal probes.

We whip through Grand Forks, and head to Fargo because of better shopping purposes. Let me tell you something, there are a lot of things that make me happy in life: my husband, quading, hockey, food but they are all competing today against Super Target. I fucking love that store…American’s love to laugh at me when I go in there…I’m amazed by anything they don’t sell in Canada, no matter what it is. We purchase a “ghetto-blaster” to play the burned cd’s that we couldn’t play in the Honda, Frank’s Buffalo Wing Hot Sauce and Coco Puffs (the latter 2 are not available in Canada, I’m so psyched!) We then proceed to our destination, but somehow get lost in Fargo for about an hour, ask for directions twice and finally make it on to Hwy 10, now 3 hrs late for the party, and are on our way. We arrive there and find Jackson and Karen, and give hugs to my favorite cop birthday girl Angie. They all proceed to tease us mercifully about how we talk and our “Canuck-isms” especially how we bought a “ghetto-blaster”. Apparently they don’t say that down here. Which makes no sense, since isn’t this the country that invented the term “ghetto” ???????? The party is fun, Angie’s brother and sister live on a farm, and it was an outside bonfire type party so I felt right at home. The majority of the group was cops, which was pretty funny in and of itself. A Breathalyzer was pulled out, and it was the evening’s fun to see how drunk Angie was every hour. At one point I heard she blew a .115 what ever that means. She did exceptionally well for drinking all the Jagermester and her share of the endless supply of homemade schnapps. Ginny was really funny too, as we all know her limited alcohol tolerance, she was chatty and began chatting to a tall, dark and obviously troubled young man. Now if there is one thing I am good at, it’s picking out the trouble in a crowd. This crackhead, on a scale of 1-10 was a 9.5. He began chatting her up and she reciprocated, worrying the majority of the group we were with. It turns out he was in prison for like 6 years for attempted murder/assault on a blind person. At this point I am trying to listen to what he is telling her and I hear….
“Yeah I had to go away for a little while” Holy shit, at this point I would have been running back into the car and back up to home. But a few compliments in her ear and she was buying into him. We are invited in by a few boys to learn more how to play Texas Hold’em and get pretty involved in that. Mr. Prison Psycho is keen on teaching the girls so he gets right in there and starts hovering over poor Karen who is too quiet and sweet to tell him to bugger off. The whole table begins to get nervous about our safety when an argument ensues about who’s hand was better and why. Amy’s husband at one point turns to a cousin and whisper’s “please make sure he doesn’t stab me tonight alright!”
We play a few hands when suddenly Amy comes into the house and tells us that the hostess would like us all out of the house, and that someone “hissed at her” when she came inside and that she wasn’t impressed. The girls, feeling uncomfortable, (although no one “hissed at her”…maybe the homebrew makes you hear voices?) leave and go head for the fire. The remainder of the evening I can sum up as follows: Psycho Guy keeps getting creepier and creepier (although we tried our best to ignore him), Jackson asks the one cop in uniform to see his “gadgets” and he cuffs her and Ginny, Psycho Boy tells the un-duty cop that “ I get into a fight everyday and that one day I’m just going to go kill everyone”, more Schnapps’, us nervous about a wobbly toddler walking around the fire while the parent’s didn’t do anything, me quitting drinking because Ginny just yanked a drink out of a cops hand, Psycho boy telling her that he wants to phone her, and go out with her (though he’s not allowed into our frigging country!!!! ) Him arguing that we are run by a Queen that he has to pay $250 dollars if he wants to come into Canada. …Un-hun sure…and us finally crashing in the car in order for us to make a quick getaway in the morning without Psycho Boy catching us.

So the morning has us quickly getting packed up, changed, and hitting the road. We have no troubles finding our ways back a different way (through Crookston) and eagerly anticipating my American Taco Bell Lunch in Grand Forks. I love American Taco Bell as much as Target, for the simple reason that they still have Mexican Pizza’s in the states. The stupid Canadian Taco Bell’s closed up their independent restaurants and made them all into lame KFC/Taco Bell’s, where all the food tastes like chicken. Gin was not very impressed because their fountain drinks weren’t working but she couldn’t work the menu like I did. I thought it was kick ass.
Then we hit Old Navy for some deals (did I mention I love Old Navy for their Folk Festival appropriate clothes?),hit the road in the long overdue sunshine, and avoid paying duty because the Canadian Border Patrol boy was only twelve. He didn't believe us that we had a friend that was from the states either. Jeesh.

Fabulous Fabulous US of A.

Gotta Love it.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005


It is amazing what a baby I am.

He came to work to say good bye and I bawled. I came back into my office and had to leave cause I bawled again.

I got home and bawled and then did it again after he called to say goodnight. And as much as I am a baby I am shallow too. The money factor is the only thing that is getting me through this. I keep calculating the paychecks when he only starts tomorrow and doesn't even recieve his first paycheck until the 13th.....of June!

Ugh, I am miserable. And I knew I would be, but I am even more miserable than I knew that I thought that I would be.
I even was going to call him this morning to ask him to come home. But we are too far gone now. We have no money coming in besides my small insufficent paychecks and there is no turning back now.....


I am such a suck.

Friday, May 20, 2005

Good for a laugh, or peeing your pants....

Here's a Link that will make the rest of the day go by a bit faster for ya....

It's the funniest shit ever, even if you aren't planning on babymaking

Enjoy peoples....and have a freaky fantastic long weekend, get drunk, go camping, go fishing, sit in a kiddie pool, have a bonfire and giddy up.


All the stars may shine bright

Things I am happy about today:

  • it's 30+ today in Winnipeg
  • it's a long weekend
  • i don't have to work on monday
  • I'm listening to Neko Case
  • People are going to send me mixed cd's
  • I'm having a bonfire party for Dan on saturday
  • I can sing as loud as I want all the way home (i"m driving)
  • Dan is setting up our new dog kennel right now
  • He tilled my new garden today too

Yay for me!!!!

Yay for you too!!!!

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Bye Bye Love......

So Dan passed his tests in Sask. and quit his job today and everything is awesome. He leaves next Wednesday. It will be so nice to pay some bills and get out of debt. He's only going to be gone for 2 weeks at a time. It won't be the greatest arrangement, but not the very worst either.

Wish me luck people!!!!
I will be leaning on you all for support for the next while.

Ps. anyone wanting to send me music, I will love you forever. I have no internet in the country and only 4 channels on tv so I am looking for some musical comfort!!! You will be greatly rewarded for you generosity.... :)

Friday, May 13, 2005

Things I have had it with......

-so called friends that call you a liar and start a big fight and bring up "well you owe me money from 16 years ago....."

-People that tailgate you because you pulled ( but left plenty of room) your vehicle in front of theirs and that made them angry so they chase you and shake their fists and freak.

- People that call and say " yeah, you just called me?" or "you number came up on my phone?" Look buddy, I got 12 people working here, anyone could have called....If you were that interested you should have picked up the phone in the first place.

-People that complain about things they have no control over : traffic, shitty weather, long commutes, etc..... deal with it and shut it!

-Parents that murder their children, girls that abandon babies in plastic bags....dumpsters etc...
If you don't want those you bring into this life, bring them to a hospital, fire department, public place......... People like me, who are having trouble conceiving or those who can't have a child of their own at all, would be thrilled to death to adopt and not have to wait 10-15 years to do so.

end of rant..... ( i love how much better i feel after this :)

Thursday, May 12, 2005

While every line speaks the language of love

Skrawl Y'all.....

If interested.......i started a poetry blog of sorts. It's called damselindistress.

It's a collection of poetry and more of my brain entered as key strokes on a page in the land of the internet.

Most of it's from about 3+ years ago, back when my life was complicated and I hated boys for their taking pleasure in agrivating me......grrrrr

hope you enjoy....


Tuesday, May 10, 2005

100 things you probably didn't know about me....stolen from HKD

1-My real first name is Melinda
2-My family has always called me Mindy
3-I'm starting to like that name more as I get older
4-I'm 25
5-I'm married
6-my husband's name is Dan
7-he's going to go work on the oil rigs
8-I'm going to miss him
10-I have a chicken pox scar on my stomach
11-i got chicken pox when I was 8
12-they kept me out of school a long time for it
13-my hair isn't really red, it's the iron in the water
14-i should get my hair cut more often
15-i can't cause i am always broke
16-i have a fixation with chocolate
17-i need it almost every day
18-it is hard not to eat it when you are dieting
19-i don't get to see my best friends enough
20-2 of them live in winnipeg and one is in van city.
21-my relationship with my parents improved when I moved out
22-dan and I started living together after a month of dating
23-we got engaged 4 months after that
24-on July 15th I will have lived in my house for a year
25-the furthest i have ever traveled is Monterey, CA in 97
26-i went with my parents
27-my favourite place to party is whistler.
28-i'll probably never get to go there again
29-i've slept with 4 times as many people as I have dated
30-the longest i have ever had a relationship with someone was 4 years
31-it wasn't my husband
32-it was someone elses husband
33-i have no regrets
34-i only wish i kept in better touch with some people
35-i have poor self image
36-i am in denial about how much
37-i struggled with depression in 1998 and 1999
38-i've lost all my grandparents except one
39-they had my parents in their late 40's
40-my surviving grandma is 92
41-i found my estranged family in BC
42-i only told my mom, cause I was scared of my dad
43-i am always nauseous
44-i only have 6 things in my fridge at the moment
45-2 I am sure are mouldy
46-I have the best job ever
47-i feel guilty for not doing more
48-i stopped coffee and coke in September
49-i only miss caramel lattes
50-i love living in Manitoba
51-i don't care that people don't like it here
52- i love traveling by plane
53- i hate riding in a car, it hurts my back
54-i was in 3 car accidents by the time i was 23
55-none were my fault
56-i've been to the dr's at least 25 times in the last year
57-I'm allergic to lobster and crab
58-and strawberries
59-but i still love strawberries
60-i love bright colors
61-If I ever get pregnant, my kids will have unusual names
62-and I don't care if dan doesn't like em
63-when he has a kid he can name them
64-i love salad bars
65-i love girl singers
66-i always wish that I could sing in a folk group
67-i'd love to be in a band like Rudimental.
68-i sing in the car all the time whether i am alone or not
69-my first crush was on Huey Lewis.
70-my longest crush was bruce willis. (from age 8 till now)
71-i love to paint and draw
72-I'm just too picky to like anything i do
73-i am too worked up all the time to paint
74-I'm a speed reader
75-I love David Fincher. Movies
76-I have divorced myself from 3 of my best friends over a fight
78-Ryan is my only guy buddy I never slept with
79-My wedding was a big nightmare
80-I have changed lots because of it
81-my relationships with my friends have changed because of it.
82-I have moved 9 times in my lifetime
83-i dont' want to ever move again
84-i want 3 children
85-I want a nice yard and garden
86-i won't have that with 2 dogs
87-i love quading
88-i was scared to drive it at first and now i love it
89-i want my own quad ( i have one picked out)
90-Since i don't have the internet at home, I'm not Mrs. Music-Know-It-All anymore
91-i love girls nights out when we stay in
92-i'm too selfconscious for the bar
93-I have Poly Cystic Ovary Syndrome.
94-it causes me to suffer a lot of symptoms
95-infertility is the biggest one
96-hence why i am anti-abortion
97-I'm also against the death penalty
98-this was easier than i thought
99-my middle name is Jean
100- there I am done!

I'm weary with right-angles, abbreviated daylight, and waiting for a winter to be done.

So Mother's Day is over.
It all worked out, and was another example of how I get worked up over nothing .

Dan got a call on Sunday night about getting a job on an oil rig out in AB and Sask. He's very excited. I am apprehensive. This would be such a win/lose situation. We could pay off all our debt, finish renovating the house, and I could get some shit done that I have always wanted: guitar lessons, mandolin lessons, a photography class, etc......


I have never lived on my own. Ever.
I have never spent a significant amount of time away from Dan. Ever.

I am afraid of being miserable the whole time he's away. I am worried that I won't be able to handle it. Although, I know, if he does go it's at least for 2 years. I will have to handle it. I am just hoping that the good ( ie: money) outweighs the bad ( ie: dan away) Somehow I doubt it.
Absense does make the heart grow fonder though right?

I am tough I am tough I am tough I am tough I am tough I am tough

lots of people do this, go through this, fix their money problems, live happily ever after

I'll be fine, I have some kick ass friends that are their for me and know what's going on....
Ginny, Krista, Vanessa.

I bet people are putting bets on me right now. All of Dan's friends told him I can't handle it.
thanks for the vote of confidence guys...

This may be the chance to get back some of the old (good) Mindy I was looking for.

Friday, May 06, 2005

Mother's day is still on

wish me luck, i'll tell you all about it on monday, if i survived.
On the plus side I get rum cake from Baba

rum cake makes almost everything better
notice the "almost"

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Protect the weak......

so the fireman "perks up"
overcame a coma
so many long years
in a "persistive vegetative state"
and I wonder
what the politicians,
and congressmen
and lawyers
would have thought about this
34 days ago
when terri was still barely alive
being starved
because they thought it was
the "right thing to do"
maybe they would have come
to a different conclusion
and saw the error of their
and perhaps been inspired
to change our "death society" ways
we seem always so quick to give up
and forget that sometimes
life does prevail
over terror, and illness and accidents
maybe one fireman, now
will have power to make us think
not give up
too quickly next time.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Why bother

So I plan this fancy elegant mother's day brunch at my house.....
In all my experience with these families I should friggin know better.

"oh ok we'll come, but you better invite Baba & Guido to come so it'll save us a trip"

"ummm alright"
(I didn't know Grandparent's Day fell on the same day)

"well be there about noon"

So I continue to plan, slightly annoyed.

Then I talk to my mother
"well your dad wants to visit your grandma in the morning so i don't know what's going on"

This would have been nice to know BEFORE I spent what little money I have on ridiculous ingredients for all this fancy crap I don't want to make anymore.

agitated AND annoyed

I phone up my dad

"So are you guys coming for breakfast because I am making breakfast food. It's pretty retarded to make breakfast food for people that show up at 2"

"We'll either do it or don't do it"
he hangs up.

So now I am left with all this crap I am supposed to make, not that Dan wouldn't appreciate it, but now I am not very interested in doing anything for Mother's Day at all.

and I should have said early breakfast
I suppose this is my fault.

Monday, May 02, 2005


i flooded my kitchen floor
the laminated floor
was floating
and dan
was yelling

if i do something wrong
but it's the result of something
he's put off and not done
am i still to blame?

mother's day is sunday
i planned a martha stewart type brunch
now everyone will have to
wear their outside shoes

the insurance company said
our deductible is $500
i choked on my pancake
and wondered how
we'd ever get that kind
of money

he's at home
with the contractor
and i am hoping that
the house will be clean
when i get home.
(and supper too)